I have a new measure of self-care in moments of pain and joy and transition. I’ve realized the people who I benefit spending time with in these simple moments are the people who love me and accept me just how I am and who I love and accept just how they are. I started calling them my soft people. They are the people who I can be soft with. They are actually some of the toughest, strongest, most loyal people in my life; the ones I would trust with my life; but because of that I can let my guard down and be soft. They are the people who I don’t have to tense up and act a certain way around.
Do you have any of these people in your life? I didn’t realize I did for a long time.
Having soft people in my life who love me just for being me only happened because I learned to be softer with myself first. I learned to forgive my mistakes, to motivate change from a kind place, to take time to listen to what I needed, to ask for help if I couldn’t handle something alone. And food is a perfect arena to start practicing this softness with yourself. Show up like that friend who is tough in the desire for you to take care of yourself and gentle when you make a mistake.
In what ways could you be softer with yourself? Grab a cup of tea, look out at the sunshine, take some deep breaths and just imagine for a moment how it would feel to be softer.